http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xpra
I think that's what you missed.
Don't have many issues with graphics drivers here...
Just about any core Windows library, service, or kernel update takes a reboot; with Linux, libraries just mean running ldconfig (which dpkg/apt/... run automatically), and services are just "service xyz restart".
The kernel still takes a reboot, unless you know what you're doing (hint: ksplice)
The "interesting updates"--that would be like Windows Vista -> Seven.
You're confusing Canonical's representation of reality with how Linux actually works.